While in Montréal  last month I met with my good friends Angelo and Stephan for breakfast. They have been together for over twenty years and are my inspiration as well as my aspiration. I became friendly initially with Stephan,(he is my hairstylist, and personifiesthe phrase  ‘The cock of the walk’.

Shortly after our initial meeting, I was introduced to his partner Angelo. Angelo is accountant for the Montréal Protestant School Board, a quiet man with beautiful soft soulful blue eyes.

When I was last in Montreal they made me a lovely dinner featuring Angelo’s famous homemade pasta. As I was getting ready to leave Angelo went to get my coat and I noticed this very large statue similar to the style of Henry Moore, in their hallway.

I asked Angelo if this was a new addition as I am often in my own special world and tend to miss this things like enormous sculptures in my friend’s living room. (Really!) Angelo said it was new. When on their recent trip to Italy Stephan spotted this statue and coveted it immediately. Angelo told me he thought it would be quite difficult to bring it home to Canada but – as he spoke to me his face softened, Stephan wanted it so badly, how could he refuse?

This dinner happened a few weeks ago and I have not stopped thinking about the moment I saw Angelo face soften into love. This is what I want. I want to experience this deep well of mutual love .

I went for a swim in my pool this morning in my ongoing attempt at fitness, and as I was swimming my thoughts turned to Angelo. I need to find my own Angelo, I thought. Wait!! I am Katharine Angelina!

I already am my own Angelo/Angelina!  I remembered this video I watched yesterday that I  thought was amazing. A true light bulb moment to speak in the Oprah vernacular.  The late Wayne Dyer was talking to Oprah about the Law of Manifestation.

Wayne said in order to have more money in your life, you must be generous. If you want more happiness, you must be joy filled. You must raise your vibration and become what you wish to  manifest in your life. As I swam back and forth in the warm water, I thought about what Wayne said and realized why I have attracted a certain kind of woman into my life, because THAT IS HOW I FEEL ABOUT MYSELF!!! BIG WOW!!

Okay my HuffPo readers, I shall stop writing in caps now, I just wanted to capture and share my excitement!

To review, if I want to manifest a kind, loving soul who will be there for me and can ‘see’ me, then I must be that for myself. I am so excited about my revelation and the possibility of getting it right this time.

This year has been a year of great personal revelation. I am beginning to take care of myself in a profound way, eating mindfully, (100 days binge free!) exercising mildly,( the aforementioned swimming of 15 – ish laps every second day) trying to stay calm and centered.

I’ve stopped swearing( for the most part, though there is nothing more satisfying than uttering a loud FUCK! when needed) and I’m very mindful of how I speak to others, but even more aware of how I speak to myself. I’m really trying to talk to myself as I would to my daughter Victoria or my best friend Marcus.

What I am not doing anymore is talking to myself like this-.

“Oh my God. I’m freaking out and I’m not well and who will still need me, who will still feed me, when I’m sixty-four!”

Instead I am talking to myself in this way:

“I will be fine. I just need to take a few deep breaths. I’m going to take a bath with my favourite lavender and rose bath salts, then I shall drink some green tea. I know all will be well.

I would love to hear what my Huffington Post readers think,

Let’s start a self- love revolution!

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